My "Little Bit - free ebook by Marie Corelli

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My "Little Bit

Marie Corelli

57 chapters

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57 chapters

MY “LITTLE BIT”

MY “LITTLE BIT”

MARIE CORELLI MY “LITTLE BIT” BY MARIE CORELLI AUTHOR OF “THE YOUNG DIANA,” “THE LIFE EVERLASTING,” “INNOCENT,” “ROMANCE OF TWO WORLDS,” “BARABBAS,” ETC. NEW publisher's logo YORK GEORGE H. DORAN COMPANY Copyright, 1919, By George H. Doran Company Printed in the United States of America DEDICATED TO MY FRIEND A. R. M. L. AND HIS FELLOW-MEMBERS OF THE CARLTON CLUB Copyright, 1919, By George H. Doran Company Printed in the United States of America DEDICATED TO MY FRIEND A. R. M. L. AND HIS FELLOW-

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PREFACE

PREFACE

The articles in this book, with the exception of the first two, were all written during the war at the request of the various editors by whose courtesy they are now reproduced in volume form. Most of them, notably those which appeared in the Pall Mall Gazette , were, by my own desire, gratuitous, though payment for them was offered. But, being unable to handle sword or gun, I was glad to offer the free service of my pen whenever such service was desired, or considered useful, just as I would hav

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SAVAGE GLORY AN APPEAL AGAINST WAR

SAVAGE GLORY AN APPEAL AGAINST WAR

( This article was written for “Nash’s Magazine” in February, 1913, without any other than instinctive premonition of the coming Great War. ) Editorial Note. — Marie Corelli’s remarkable article should be read by every man and woman at all mindful of the welfare of their fellow-sojourners on this little swinging ball of ours, which we call the earth. This contribution is far and away one of the most brilliant pieces of writing Miss Corelli has ever achieved; it is thought-compelling and in the l

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THE GREAT UNREST

THE GREAT UNREST

(This article was written for “Nash’s Magazine” two years before the War, and was on its appearance prefaced by the following Editor’s Note.) Editor’s Note. — While “Nash’s Magazine” cheerfully presents the following very radical and profoundly interesting article from the brilliant pen of Miss Marie Corelli, this Magazine should not in any sense be held accountable for either the Author’s views or her expression of them. “Ye hypocrites! Ye can discern the face of the sky and of the earth, but h

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THE WHIRLWIND

THE WHIRLWIND

It has come at last—that great Storm foretold by national weather prophets—it has come with all the devastating force of a fury long suppressed; and the black cloud has gathered over our heads while yet we drowsed in a dream of sunshine. With a sudden thunderous rush, as though a god or a demon should tread the spaces of the air, heaven has let loose the whirlwind—the whirlwind of War, and far more than War—the whirlwind of Destiny. It has come because it was bound to come, by the Unwritten Law

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WASTED OPPORTUNITY

WASTED OPPORTUNITY

To Kaiser William more than to any other monarch of his time was given the glorious chance of becoming the greatest benefactor of Germany which that realm had ever known. He could have created for his people such conditions of peace, happiness, and prosperity as were almost incalculable. He stood in the broad sunshine of ripening trade—the markets of the world were open to him—fields of wealth were spreading around him on all sides, and his cheerfully working millions had but to reap the grain t

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A TRAGIC WITNESS

A TRAGIC WITNESS

During the grim and ghastly struggle at Verdun we are told the Kaiser, standing “at safe distance,” watched through his field-glasses the fiery mowing down of his countrymen to the number of forty-five thousand! Does any one, reading this, take the trouble to pause and consider what it means? Forty-five thousand strong, brave men in the flower of manhood (for let us hope we are none of us so unjust as to deny our enemies their strength or their courage); forty-five thousand capable human beings

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THE CRIME OF STUPIDITY

THE CRIME OF STUPIDITY

Voltaire is accredited with the saying that “the only crime is stupidity.” According to this dictum one must come to consider the “All-Highest War Lord” the greatest criminal of an epoch, his stupidity being almost without parallel in history. What man, not entirely mad, seeing a world of prosperity within reach of his hand would clench his fist and knock the whole splendid sphere away from him at one blow! The proposition seems absurd and untenable, yet it has been and continues to be the Kaise

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BRITISH APATHY

BRITISH APATHY

Mr. Hughes, Prime Minister of Australia, said in a recent speech that Germany “had abused our foolishly generous hospitality.” This is not quite accurate, since we were neither so generous nor hospitable as careless and lazy. We allowed our trades to slip through our fingers—the State did nothing for native work, science, or invention—and ambitious men of hope and endeavour left the country in shoals to make fortunes in other lands, many firms establishing themselves in Germany in order to win t

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LOSS AND GAIN

LOSS AND GAIN

And now the rivers of gold that were flowing into Germany through her trade are stopped, “damned up” as the sensational special correspondent would say—by British, French, and German dead! The latest estimate of German losses at Verdun is two hundred thousand! Does the Kaiser, at safe distance, still “look on”? What blessing has this monarch of a great and productive realm brought upon his people? Mourning, desolation, and irremediable misery! No triumph, no victory can atone for such a deluge o

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IDEAL WORTH FIGHTING FOR

IDEAL WORTH FIGHTING FOR

This is, and this will be, the case with Germany. For years her people have willingly listened to the teachings of egoists and madmen such as Treitschke and Nietzsche—for years they have scoffed at Christianity, its Founder and its ethics; and they have tempted the Divine Spirit in Man with the devil’s whisper, “All these things will I give thee if thou wilt fall down and worship me!” But that Divine Spirit is stronger than all Germany and its rulers; and “Get thee behind me, Satan!” is the keyn

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POISONOUS TEACHING

POISONOUS TEACHING

Glory and honour never accompany the creed of selfish Materialism, which is the “Kultur” of Germany. What a miserable man was he who wrote down in cold blood these words: “I condemn Christianity. To me it is the greatest of all possible corruptions. I call Christianity the one great curse, the one great intrinsic depravity, the one immortal shame and blemish in the human race!” This was Nietzsche—poor, sickly, egoist, Nietzsche! He died mad—yet he was the “guide, philosopher, and friend” of mode

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“ALL WE LIKE SHEEP” A PEOPLE’S PATIENCE (First published in the “Sunday Times”)

“ALL WE LIKE SHEEP” A PEOPLE’S PATIENCE (First published in the “Sunday Times”)

The words “people” and “popular,” viewed by academic dark-lanterns of literature, are opprobious epithets. Any person designated as “popular,” or favoured by “the People,” falls at once outside the pale of mutual-admiration societies— ergo , is not an academic dark-lantern for the blind to lead the blind, so that both fall into the ditch. Yet it is well understood that those who affect to despise the People and “popular” opinion are the very ones most influenced by both, inasmuch as not one amon

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WANTED—MORE WOMEN! AN APPEAL (Written for the London “Daily Chronicle”)

WANTED—MORE WOMEN! AN APPEAL (Written for the London “Daily Chronicle”)

Women! You are wanted by the Nation! In the words of the recruiting posters “Your Country calls!” It calls even You —you, who for centuries have been the “weak vessels” of man’s passion and humour, are now needed to strengthen man’s hands in the terrific business of a world’s battle. You have helped them already; but you must help them still more. Now is the day and hour to prove your “undaunted mettle,” and not only your mettle but your generosity, your magnanimity, your forgiveness! For in pea

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THE QUALITY OF MERCY AN APPEAL TO AMERICA FOR SUFFERERS IN THE GREAT WAR (Written by special request for the American “Committee of Mercy”)

THE QUALITY OF MERCY AN APPEAL TO AMERICA FOR SUFFERERS IN THE GREAT WAR (Written by special request for the American “Committee of Mercy”)

There is no greater virtue in the human character than mercy; it is the nearest attribute and approach to the Divine Perfection towards Whom all creation instinctively moves. We, the offspring of that infinite Thought and Will, are still far away from such sweet and strong attainment of power as can find infinitude of joy in the infinitude of Giving—but we can in some measure bless and purify our brief poor lives with somewhat of that everlasting plenitude and beauty by an effort, no matter how

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STARVING BELGIUM AN APPEAL (Written by request for Mr. Hoover’s “Belgium Relief Fund,” and circulated through the United States Press)

STARVING BELGIUM AN APPEAL (Written by request for Mr. Hoover’s “Belgium Relief Fund,” and circulated through the United States Press)

“ Six million of people are on the verge of starvation in Belgium! ” Such news as this writes itself across the brain in letters of fire! Great Goddess of Liberty, think of it! You, America!—you, who represent that goddess, with the light of an ever-widening glory on her brow, think of this shame to the very name of Freedom!—this blot on civilisation—this degrading result, as it were, of our long-boasted intellectual supremacy and scientific advancement! Six million people on the verge of starva

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“THE TIME OF OUR LIVES” OUR WOMEN IN WAR (An answer to an American misjudgment)

“THE TIME OF OUR LIVES” OUR WOMEN IN WAR (An answer to an American misjudgment)

“You women over here seem to be having the time of your lives!” said an American friend to me the other day. “You lunch and dine at all the restaurants with whatever men ‘on leave’ you can pick up; you go with them to music-halls and theatres and supper dances, and ‘peacock’ about in extravagant clothes as if there were no such thing as a war on!” My American friend, being a man, took, as is often the case with men, rather a one-sided view of things; but what he said is true, and I fully endorse

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SANITY IN RELIGION

SANITY IN RELIGION

Here we touch the vital centre of the whole. On no subject does man ever show himself so violently crazed as on religion. The gods of the past, created by his fanatical imagination, were more or less the deified types of his own vices, or symbols of such virtues as he feebly strove to attain, but he had no real faith in their power to aid or to circumvent his designs. Yet, in lunatic fashion, he behaved as if he thought them omnipotent, though conscious all the while of the silly comedy he was p

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BRAIN BALANCE

BRAIN BALANCE

The brain, as all physiologists know, is a complex and marvellous mechanism—so amazing in its movements, so miraculous in the result of these movements, that no scientist has yet been able entirely to probe its powers or foresee its progressive possibilities. Some there are who declare that all impulses, good and evil, are primarily started by the brain—others, more subtly accurate, aver that the brain itself is impelled or “pushed” to action by an influence stronger than itself, mysterious, unn

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THE IMPORTANCE OF CHARACTER

THE IMPORTANCE OF CHARACTER

The brain is affected by “insane impulse” in the same way as the digestion is affected by improper food. An error in diet will cause pain and general malaise —so will an evil influence or suggestion disorganise the brain cells and create obstacle and confusion within their marvellous formation and movement. A child, from earliest years, needs watching—and those who have that duty to perform should be carefully selected persons who are particular as to general surroundings. A child’s mother or nu

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SCIENCE AND RELIGION

SCIENCE AND RELIGION

Religion is not what the Churches would have us accept as such. It is not man-made dogma. So far as Christianity is concerned, the saying is true that “There never was but one Christian and He was crucified.” No more uplifting faith was ever taught than that of Christ; but it has never been spiritually realised or fully practised. Read Christ’s own words in the New Testament, and then ask where shall we find His commands obeyed? In some exceptional cases there have been saintly lives and saintly

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HAS CHRISTIANITY FAILED?

HAS CHRISTIANITY FAILED?

Has Christianity failed? No! Men and women have “failed,” but not Christianity. The very question is to my mind terrible and blasphemous—one of the many terrible and blasphemous utterances common to the Press and current literature during recent years. It is a shame to a professingly Christian nation that such a question should be asked at all. The greatest, purest religion in the world can have no weight with mere apes of humanity, who practise the most appalling hypocrisy in front of the sacre

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SNOOKS’S OPINION

SNOOKS’S OPINION

Snooks is one of those entertaining persons who makes a point of giving an “opinion” on everything. From the Almighty downwards he has what he calls a “calm common-sense view” on all subjects in heaven or on earth, and his chief object in life is to get that “calm, common-sense view” on all to the front, so that the poor, purblind, uneducated public who seldom have any time to indulge in “views,” and still less chance to express them, may understand that there yet exists one truly great man of s

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THE SPLENDID SERVICE OF THE SEA (Written by request for the Navy League)

THE SPLENDID SERVICE OF THE SEA (Written by request for the Navy League)

In this greatest War of all history, a War which in extent, in terrifying armaments, and in massed millions of men surpasses in fearful slaughter and incalculable results all the battles ever chronicled from earliest times to now, why is it that in these Isles of Britain, the nucleus of the Empire most concerned, there is so much indifference, apathy, and real ignorance displayed among the general public of the “man-in-the-street” type concerning the silent but ever vigilant work of our Navy? Th

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THE LILIES OF FRANCE (Written by request for “The Golden Book of France”)

THE LILIES OF FRANCE (Written by request for “The Golden Book of France”)

Glorious Lilies! Stainless and sweet, they spring from a sacred soil, wet with the life-blood of brave men and the tears of noble women! They are the Children of France and of the Future!—the gracious youth of a happier day, when tyranny and fear are past, and when Peace of the highest and purest is the canopy of safety and honour, under which the nation may rest after long and bitter strife! The Lilies of girlhood and boyhood; the Children, some of them deprived of fathers and mothers, but neve

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“WHOSO SHALL RECEIVE ONE SUCH LITTLE CHILD!” (Written on behalf of St. Nicholas Home for “Raid-shock” Children at Chailry, Sussex)

“WHOSO SHALL RECEIVE ONE SUCH LITTLE CHILD!” (Written on behalf of St. Nicholas Home for “Raid-shock” Children at Chailry, Sussex)

Nothing is lovelier than the sight of a perfectly happy child—a little, laughing, dancing, restless, sparkling bit of humanity just beginning to expand into life like a plant putting forth leaves and tendrils and buds that promise fairest flowering—a creature of unspoilt confidence and innocence whose whole consciousness is absorbed in wonder and delight at the strange newness of the world around it, and all the beautiful, amazing things the world offers for its attraction and pleasure. The flig

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APPEAL FOR THE FRENCH RED CROSS (Written for the Shakespeare Memorial Theatre, July, 1918)

APPEAL FOR THE FRENCH RED CROSS (Written for the Shakespeare Memorial Theatre, July, 1918)

Dear Friends! —We are here to-day in the name of France; France, the beautiful, the beloved country, now ravaged and desolated by the crudest enemy that ever dishonoured the name of War. I am asked to make an appeal to you,—to you, the people of the land of Shakespeare, on behalf of the people of the land of Victor Hugo,—and I esteem it an honour, a privilege, and a duty to plead this great Cause. I ask you to look away from yourselves, your own interests, your own comforts in this peaceful town

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GLORY OF THE WORCESTERS (Written by request in aid of the Homes for Disabled Worcestershire Soldiers and Sailors) A TRIBUTE TO A FAMOUS REGIMENT

GLORY OF THE WORCESTERS (Written by request in aid of the Homes for Disabled Worcestershire Soldiers and Sailors) A TRIBUTE TO A FAMOUS REGIMENT

Far down the long annals of past history we must look for the beginnings of the brave breed of Worcestershire men—the outcome of that ancient heroic blood which nourishes the flower of chivalry and strengthens the spirit to perform imperishable deeds of valour. Between a band of tenacious Britons holding the summits of the Malvern Hills, and a military guard and outpost of Roman warriors at Worcester itself, was seemingly produced that special type of Englishman who, ever since those far-away da

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EYES OF THE SEA (Written by special request of the Directors for the British and Foreign Sailors’ Society) A TRIBUTE TO THE GRAND FLEET AND ADMIRAL BEATTY

EYES OF THE SEA (Written by special request of the Directors for the British and Foreign Sailors’ Society) A TRIBUTE TO THE GRAND FLEET AND ADMIRAL BEATTY

“Then said David to the Philistine, ‘Thou comest to me with a sword and a spear and with a shield, but I come to thee in the name of the Lord of Hosts.... This day will the Lord deliver thee into mine hand!’” We all know that in Bible history there was a certain Goliath of Gath. His height was six cubits and a span,—that is to say, about ten feet. He had a helmet of brass, and he wore a coat of mail weighing five thousand shekels of brass,—about a hundred and fifty-six pounds. He had brass on hi

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IS ALL WELL WITH ENGLAND? A QUESTION OF THE MOMENT

IS ALL WELL WITH ENGLAND? A QUESTION OF THE MOMENT

Yes, all is well! Or, rather, let us say all will be well! And in our steady progress towards future good we may confidently aver that all is well even now. Even now! though the great “spring-cleaning” of the Empire’s house is scarcely half-way through. Our home is topsy-turvy, familiar objects are thrust aside, our goods and chattels are disarranged and turned out to be swept or beaten or otherwise relieved of their accumulated dust and cobwebs, and the clatter of brooms and pails and general h

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THE WORLD IN TEARS

THE WORLD IN TEARS

( The following was written at the request of Mr. Robert Hayes, the publisher, who asked for it as a preface to a helpful little book of “Messages of Hope, Sympathy, and Consolation,” entitled The World in Tears . Those who contributed to this book included many well-known “leaders,” such as the Bishop of Birmingham, the Archdeacon of Westminster, the Dean of Manchester, etc., etc., and the publisher introduced my article in the following kindly note:— In preparing the book for Press it was thou

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GOD AND THE WAR (Written for “Some 1918 Reflections.” A collection arranged by Guy Glendower Croft)

GOD AND THE WAR (Written for “Some 1918 Reflections.” A collection arranged by Guy Glendower Croft)

Among the many “reflections” flashed upon the mirror of the time there is one which to my mind is not so much a “reflection” as a blur—a blot which is almost a dark and deepening shadow. I, who venture to write of it, own myself to be but a mere romancist, whose ostensible business is to weave night and day, like the “Lady of Shalott,”—“A magic web with colours gay,” a web of thought-tapestry into scenes and episodes which may or may not please my readers and distract them from the continuous ha

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TRIUMPH OF WOMANHOOD (Written for the Scottish Women’s Hospital)

TRIUMPH OF WOMANHOOD (Written for the Scottish Women’s Hospital)

As a light in deep darkness she has arisen—woman, pure womanly, with all the God-given attributes of her highest nature at last acknowledged by her self-styled “lord and master,” Man! She has shaken off the trammels which for many centuries he had fastened about her—as heroic maid and mother she has roused the better spirit in him. Out of the gloom and blood and slaughter of this world war—the most wicked war that ever devastated the earth—she has radiated upon him like an angel, clothed in a gl

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IN PRAISE OF ENEMIES (Published in the “Sunday Times”)

IN PRAISE OF ENEMIES (Published in the “Sunday Times”)

We are not always thankful for our blessings; often, indeed, we do not recognise them as such. They come to us disguised in the fashion of curses, or so we are apt to consider them till we know better. Many of us are absurdly proud of the number of our friends; with equal absurdity we deplore our evil destiny if we have but one enemy. Yet if all the truth were known, we should find that we have more reason to thank God for our foes than for our friends! In the actual storm and stress of life’s b

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RECRUITING SPEECH (Delivered in the De Montfort Hall, Leicester)

RECRUITING SPEECH (Delivered in the De Montfort Hall, Leicester)

In the De Montfort Hall, Leicester, at the conclusion of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Lecture on the Great War, Miss Marie Corelli, who presided as Chairman, made an appeal for recruits in the following terms:— “There is very little for me or for any one to say, after what we have heard to-night. The moving and magnificent panorama which Sir Arthur Conan Doyle has brought before our eyes by the force of his eloquence should inspire us more to deeds than words. He has told us what our men have alread

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SPLENDID CANADA A TRIBUTE

SPLENDID CANADA A TRIBUTE

To you, brave Canadians, to you who have fought so magnificently for the old Mother-Country, and of whose valour and dash and spirit never too much can be said or sung, I would address Tennyson’s noble lines:— The one true seed of Freedom! This is deeply implanted in our Empire, and you Canadian boys are fostering it and helping it to grow. Your help is needed in peace as much as in war; we want your strength, youth, and resolution as a firm bulwark against internal discords and mischievous disl

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SHELLS; AND OTHER SHELLS (Written by request for the Magazine published on behalf of the Munition Workers of Georgetown, Paisley) A THOUGHT

SHELLS; AND OTHER SHELLS (Written by request for the Magazine published on behalf of the Munition Workers of Georgetown, Paisley) A THOUGHT

In one of the finest and tenderest poems ever written by our last great Laureate, Alfred Tennyson, whose departure from this world closed, for the time, the reign of true English lyrical melody, there occur these delicately beautiful lines:— How often we have seen such shells as these!—and how little have we associated the familiar name of “shell” with any thought of war or “shock” or bloodshed! Holding a sea-shell close against our ears we listen in fancy to the solemn music of the ocean surgin

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DARKNESS AND LIGHT (Written at the request of Sir Arthur Pearson as the Prologue to an Entertainment on behalf of St. Dunstan’s Hostel for Soldiers and Sailors Blinded in the War)

DARKNESS AND LIGHT (Written at the request of Sir Arthur Pearson as the Prologue to an Entertainment on behalf of St. Dunstan’s Hostel for Soldiers and Sailors Blinded in the War)

You , whose eyes are able to read these tragic lines of blind John Milton, can you realise what they mean? Do you feel to the innermost core of your heart the blackness of that “eclipse without all hope of day,” which like a never-lifting cloud envelopes those from whom the blessing of sight has been taken for ever! Can you, even by the utmost exertion of your imagination, truly grasp what it would mean to you if all light and colour were blotted out from your consciousness, and you had to rely

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SWEEPING THE COUNTRY

SWEEPING THE COUNTRY

They say it does; and I hardly wonder! The broom is so long and searchful; it goes into so many holes and corners that surely not a single spider’s web is left unvisited. It gathers up the pale dust of British gullability with an admirable adroitness, and what is perhaps the best thing about it is that it pays for its sweepings. Not every broom does that! But I am told—I do not assert it or vouch for it—that it is a German broom; and no make of broom in all the world is more capable of industry

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TO SAVE LIFE OR DESTROY IT? A CHALLENGE TO CERTAIN CLERGY (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

TO SAVE LIFE OR DESTROY IT? A CHALLENGE TO CERTAIN CLERGY (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

Does the Christian Church profess to follow the teaching of Christ? Or the Law of Moses? That is to say: Is it Christian or Jewish? If Jewish, its “sabbath” should be kept on Saturday, in conformance with the rest of the Jewish world; if Christian, then, according to Christ, we may, if necessity compels, do imperative work on Sunday. But a section of our clergy are up in arms at the idea of “profaning the Lord’s Day” by allowing labour of tillage and planting the land on Sundays, for the necessi

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THE WAR LOAN HOW IT MIGHT BE INCREASED (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

THE WAR LOAN HOW IT MIGHT BE INCREASED (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

We are all bound for victory. Every nerve and sinew of every man and woman in Imperial Britain is bent on the task of winning it, not only for ourselves, but for the whole civilised world. America knows, and the intimidated and secretly tampered with neutrals also know, as well as we do, that the full triumph of the Allies means their great peace as well as ours—their advantage, their progress, their commerce, as well as ours. That brave and straight-speaking hero of science, Thomas Edison, rece

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FOOD PRODUCTION A PLEA FOR COMMON SENSE (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

FOOD PRODUCTION A PLEA FOR COMMON SENSE (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

Talk of “National Service!” Where is the man, woman, or child that refuses to do any really necessary or useful work for the country? Such cannot be found! There is an eager and splendid willingness in every one to give his or her best; but without proper organisation the fine forces of this fine, patient, and enduring people are scattered and disunited. From all that the bewildered mind can gather through the roaring megaphone of an apparently semi-crazed and ruinously expensive system of adver

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OUR FORTUNATE “RESTRICTIONS” (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

OUR FORTUNATE “RESTRICTIONS” (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

The Germans are reported to be in ecstasy over what they call the “despairing appeal” of the Prime Minister’s great “restrictions” speech. But, however great their “ecstasy” may be, it can hardly equal ours! For we have sufficient sense to see what hope and strength for our Empire springs, like a bright rainbow, from what the Boche obtusely imagines is a cloud. Our “lead” is towards increasing prosperity and happiness for all. We are invited to look forward to a self-supporting country; we are g

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“HIS PAINFUL DUTY” THE SORROWS OF THE HOME SECRETARY (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

“HIS PAINFUL DUTY” THE SORROWS OF THE HOME SECRETARY (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

We grieve for Sir George Cave. He suffers as a martyr suffers in the cause of his country. Martyrs are not so common as heroes nowadays, but Sir George puts in no claim to heroism. He leaves that to “Tommy.” “Tommy” makes short work of the Huns wherever and however he meets them, but Sir George is almost on the verge of tears because he is unable to make their stay on in this country as agreeable and profitable as he would wish. In the House of Commons he said: “Only the other day it was his pai

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THE POTATO “SCREAM” A PROTEST AGAINST A STUPID PANIC (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

THE POTATO “SCREAM” A PROTEST AGAINST A STUPID PANIC (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

No potatoes! Dear, dear; whatever shall we do? Some of the clever boys who write the “purple patches” for the sensational Press say that the present shortage is “nothing compared to the grim possibilities of the near future.” “Grim possibilities” is good—a phrase that will delight the Huns! But, quite dispassionately, may it not be asked how Britain got on without potatoes in her historic past? Henry VIII. was a goodly King; he ate greedily, drank heavily, and married profusely, but never a pota

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“HISTORY REPEATS ITSELF” A STUDY IN WAR BREAD (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

“HISTORY REPEATS ITSELF” A STUDY IN WAR BREAD (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

Complaints are rife and bitter concerning the tough, indigestible, and injurious mixture permitted to the taxpaying public as “war bread.” General condemnation of Government flour has been expressed at a meeting of the London Master Bakers’ Protection Society, where a resolution was passed asking for an interview with the Prime Minister to point out the “ineptitude” of the Ministry of Food. Thousands of us are of the same mind with the Master Bakers! Thousands of us affirm the “ineptitude” of wh

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“SHODDY CHIVALRY” A NAVAL CHADBAND (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

“SHODDY CHIVALRY” A NAVAL CHADBAND (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

So now we know! No longer need we denounce the “submarine menace”; no longer need we (as the German Press suggests) “grow pallid with fear,” for we are in “brave and gallant hands!” “Brave and gallant” are the noble creatures who sink hospital ships; “brave and gallant” are the sharers of dividends in the corpse-fat factory; “brave and gallant” are the raiders who sought to intercept the Prime Minister on his way back from France across Channel in order to make short work of him and his escort—“

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“HINDENBURG’S EYE!” THE BABIES’ BOGEY (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

“HINDENBURG’S EYE!” THE BABIES’ BOGEY (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

There are several objections raised to the merry-go-round “National Service” whirl devised by Mr. Neville Chamberlain. “Uneasy lies the head that wears a crown” nowadays, even if it only be the crown of a temporary Director of Service or of Food Production. Even Lord Devonport comes in for his share of contumely, especially since he assumed that a 5-oz. chop was sufficient for a busy City man’s luncheon. Lord Devonport has evidently never tried his hand at cooking, and is blissfully unaware how

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“HOARDING” A MODERN SETTING OF AN OLD PLAY AND A LITTLE STORY OF THE Y.M.C.A.

“HOARDING” A MODERN SETTING OF AN OLD PLAY AND A LITTLE STORY OF THE Y.M.C.A.

Nothing in all the various confused and contradictory orders issued by the capricious and neurotic “Dora” gave such unalloyed festive delight as the edict against “hoarding.” It opened the door to all the little spies and scandal-mongers of every neighbourhood, especially to the provincial types of these gentry, who are always of a more inquisitive and slanderous disposition than the same class found in large cities, for the reason that they have little other excitement beyond the gratifying sti

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THREE HUNDRED YEARS OF FAME AVE SHAKESPEARE!

THREE HUNDRED YEARS OF FAME AVE SHAKESPEARE!

Three hundred years ago, on April 23, 1616, William Shakespeare, of whom Carlyle wrote as “the pink and flower of remembered Englishmen—the greatest thing we have yet done and managed to produce in this world,” drew his last breath at “New Place,” the home he had earned for himself in his native town of Stratford-on-Avon. The great bell of the Guild Chapel facing the garden side of his “pretty house of brick and timber” tolled for his passing; but the great voice of the world which acclaims him

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SHAKESPEARE’S WAR BIRTHDAY IN 1917 NEGLECTED HONOURS

SHAKESPEARE’S WAR BIRTHDAY IN 1917 NEGLECTED HONOURS

Many of our newspapers devoted columns of matter to “St. George’s Day”; and the writers of the various articles on this subject “gushed” in special and particular fashion over a purely mythical knight, whom legendary lore supposes to have killed a purely mythical dragon. But a very general omission was made of a real and a far greater personage than St. George, whose day of birth and death coincides with that of the dragon-slayer, namely, William Shakespeare, “the beautifullest English soul this

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“DON’T TRAVEL” A HARD HIT (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

“DON’T TRAVEL” A HARD HIT (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

We are all called upon to make sacrifices, both public and personal. No one can assert that we do not make them willingly, and for the most part uncomplainingly. But our Dictators appear blind to the fact that in many cases their orders and “restrictions” are ruining British trades, while affording the greatest possible relief and satisfaction to the Boches. The well-fed Huns heard with malicious glee the admission of Mr. Bonar Law that we were at one time short of fighting men by a hundred thou

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“TE DEUM LAUDAMUS” THE GREAT THANKSGIVING (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

“TE DEUM LAUDAMUS” THE GREAT THANKSGIVING (Published in the “Pall-Mall Gazette”)

It is time we gave thanks—indeed, it is more than time! Perhaps, had we seen more clearly into the future we might have given thanks long before this—thanks for our kinship with America—for the ties of blood, of language, of tradition, memory, and association which have made us, as some say, “cousins,” but as we prefer to believe, brothers—brothers in heart and soul, as we are to-day brothers-in-arms. Let it be admitted that we have not always quite understood each other. Small rancours, petty j

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THE WOMEN’S VOTE NATURE VERSUS POLITICS

THE WOMEN’S VOTE NATURE VERSUS POLITICS

Those far-sighted and indulgent men who supported “Votes for Women” should surely be enjoying to the full the result of their pliability and humour! In the “Coupon Election” they expected six million feminine votes—for Coalition, of course. If we conjugate Ministerial messages as one verb, they could all have been rendered thus: “ I expect, you expect, he expects” women to do their duty. But one point seems rather overlooked, and that is, the precise idea women have of duty. When I say “women” I

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A “HAPPY THOUGHTS” DAY (Written specially for the Grantham Red Cross Outings Fund)

A “HAPPY THOUGHTS” DAY (Written specially for the Grantham Red Cross Outings Fund)

Here is an idea for every one—young and old, rich and poor! Let us institute a “Happy Thoughts” Day!—one day out of the seven on which we resolve to think only “Happy” thoughts! Thoughts of kindness, tenderness, hope, and unselfishness—thoughts which, even while we think them, take fairy wings and fly from ourselves to our neighbours and propagate other happy thoughts, creating cheerfulness and hope wherever they go. It is not easy, perhaps, to think “happy” thoughts in dark days, but no good ta

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WHY DID I——?

WHY DID I——?

I should not presume to write this answer to numerous correspondents, had it not been for the precedent given by Mr. Garvin, the erudite editor of the Observer , who recently allotted several columns of his own paper to the praise of his own book. Wherefore, gladly accepting this “lead” from one who knows so much more about literary “management” than I do, I take the opportunity of replying to several letters demanding “Why” I wrote my last published novel, The Young Diana . Why? Well, because (

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IN THE HUSH OF THE DAWN A THOUGHT

IN THE HUSH OF THE DAWN A THOUGHT

Silence now where so lately the guns thundered their terrific message,—silence, beautiful and wonderful, where just a while ago the bursting bombs and shrieking shells tore the air on their errands of doom. Silence!—peace!—the hush of the dawn before the rising of the sun! Nothing in nature is perhaps more impressive than this dumb spell which precedes approaching morning,—when every blade of grass, every leaf on every tree seems to wait attentively for the day. And nothing in the condition of h

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