Society As I Have Found It - free ebook by Ward McAllister

AUTHOR’S NOTE.

One who reads this book through will have as rough a mental journey as his physical nature would undergo in riding over a corduroy road in an old stage-coach. It makes no pretension to either scholarship or elegant diction. W. McA....

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CHAPTER I.

My Family—My Mother an Angel of Beauty and Charity—My Father’s Nobleness of Character—Building Bonfires on Paradise Rocks and Flying Kites from Purgatory with Uncle Sam Ward—My Brother the Soldier—My Brother the Lawyer. In 1820 my mother, a beautiful girl of eighteen years, was introduced into New York society by her sister, Mrs. Samuel Ward, the wife of Samuel Ward, the banker, of the firm of Prime, Ward &amp; King. She was a great belle in the days when Robert and Richard Ray and Prescott

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LAW AND HOUSEKEEPING.

My New York Life—A Penurious Aunt who Fed me on Turkey—My First Fancy Ball—Spending One Thousand Dollars for a Costume—The Schermerhorns give a Ball in Great Jones Street—Sticking a Man’s Calf and Drawing Blood—A Craze for Dancing—I Study Law—Blackstone has a Rival in Lovely Southern Maidens—I go to San Francisco in ’50—Fees Paid in Gold Dust—Eggs at $2—My First Housekeeping—A faux pas at a Reception. I myself soon left Savannah for New York after Hall’s departure, residing there in Tenth St

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INTRODUCTION TO LONDON SPORTS.

Introduction to London Sports—A Dog Fight in the Suburbs—Sporting Ladies—The Drawing of the Badger—My Host gets Gloriously Drunk—Visit to Her Majesty’s Kitchen—Dinner with the Chef of Windsor Castle—I taste Mantilla Sherry for the First Time—“A Shilling to Pay for the ‘Times.’ ” After my marriage I took up my residence in Newport, buying a farm on Narragansett Bay and turning farmer in good earnest. I planted out 10,000 trees on that farm and then went to Europe to let them grow, expecting a

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A WINTER IN ITALY.

A Winter in Florence and Rome—Cheap Living and Good Cooking—Walnut-fed Turkeys—The Grand Duke of Tuscany’s Ball—An American Girl who Elbowed the King—What a Ball Supper Should be—Ball to the Archduke of Tuscany—“The Duke of Pennsylvania”—Following the Hounds on the Campagna—The American Minister Snubs American Gentlemen. I landed in France, not knowing how to speak the language, and only remembering a few French words learned in childhood. It was the year of the Paris Exposition of 1857; all

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GERMANY AND THE ALPS.

Summer in Baden-Baden—The Late Emperor William no Judge of Wine—My Irish Doctor—His Horror of Water—How an American Girl Tried to Captivate Him—The Louisiana Judge—I Win the Toss and Get the Mule—The Judge “fixes” his Pony—The “Pike Ballet.” We passed our summer at Baden-Baden and literally lived there in the open air. Opposite to my apartment, Prince Furstenburg of Vienna had his hotel: from him and his suite I learned how to spend the summer months. At early dawn they were out in the saddl

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WINTER IN PAU.

Winter in Pau—I Hire a Perfect Villa for $800 a year—Luxury at Small Cost—I Learn How to Give Dinners—Fraternizing with the Bordeaux Wine Merchants—The Judge’s Wild Scheme—I Get Him up a Dinner—General Bosquet—The Pau Hunt—The Frenchmen Wear Beautiful Pink Coats but their Horses Wont Jump—Only the General Took the Ditch. After you have been a little while in Europe you are seized with a desire to have a house of your own, to enjoy home comforts. Your loss of individuality comes over you. In

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HOME AGAIN.

My Return to New York—Dinner to a Well-known Millionaire—Visit of Lord Frederick Cavendish, Hon. E. Ashley, and G. W. des Voeux to the United States—I Entertain Them at My Southern Home—My Father’s Old Friends Resent my Manner of Entertaining—Her Majesty’s Consul disgruntled—Cedar Wash-tubs and Hot Sheets for my English Guests—Shooting Snipe over the Rice Lands—Scouring the Country for Pretty Girls. Called home by the stupidity of an agent, who was unable to treat with my old friend, Commodo

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MERRYMAKING IN THE SOUTH.

A Southern Deer Park—A Don Quixote Steed—We Hunt for Deer and Bag a Turkey—Getting a Dinner by Force—The French Chef and the Colored Cook Contrasted—One is Inspired, the Other Follows Tradition—Making a Sauce of Herbs and Cream—Shooting Ducks Across the Moon—A Dawfuskie Pic-nic. In a small place, life is monotonous if you do not in some way break up this monotony. I bethought me of a friend who lived some distance from Savannah, who had a deer park, was a sportsman, and was also the soul of

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LIFE AT NEWPORT.

I Leave the South—A Typical British Naval Officer—An Officer of the Household Troops—Early Newport Life—A Country Dinner—The Way I got up Picnics—Farmers Throw their Houses Open to Us—A Bride Receives us in her Bridal Array—My Newport Farm—My Southdowns and my Turkeys—What an English Lady said of our Little Island—Newport a place to Take Social Root in. My English friends bidding me farewell, soon after, I gave up my Savannah house and made Newport my permanent home, for I spent nine months

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SOCIETY’S LEADERS.

Society’s Leaders—A Lady whose Dinners were Exquisite and whose Wines were Perfect—Her “Blue Room Parties”—Two Colonial Beauties—The Introduction of the Chef—The Prince of Wales in New York—The Ball in his Honor at the Academy of Music—The Fall of the Dancing Platform—Grotesque Figures cut by the Dancers—The Prince Dances Well—Admirable Supper Arrangements—A Light Tea and a Big Appetite—The Prince at West Point—I get a Snub from General Scott. Society must have its leader or leaders. It has alwa

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DELIGHTS OF COUNTRY LIFE.

A Handsome, Courtly Man—A Turkey Chase—A Visit to Livingston Manor—An Ideal Life—On Horseback from Staatsburg to New York—Village Inn Dinners—I Entertain a Fashionable Party at the Gibbons Mansion—An Old House Rejuvenated—The Success of the Party—Country Life may be Enjoyed Here as well as in England if one has the Money and the Inclination for it—It means Hard Work for the Host, though. All my life I had been taught to have a sort of reverence for the name of Livingston, and to feel that Li

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FASHIONABLE PEOPLE.

John Van Buren’s Dinner—I spend the Entire Day in getting my Dress-Coat—Lord Hartington criticises American Expressions—Contrast in our Way of Living in 1862 and 1890—In Social Union is Social Strength—We band Together for our Common Good—The Organisation of the “Cotillion Dinners”—The “Smart” Set, and the “Solid” Set—A Defense of Fashion. Meeting John Van Buren as I left the cars in Jersey City to cross the ferry to New York, he insisted on my dining with him that day at the Union Club, to

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COTILLIONS IN DOORS AND OUT.

Cost of Cotillion Dinners—My delicate Position—The Début of a Beautiful Blonde—Lord Roseberry’s mot—We have better Madeira than England—I am dubbed “The Autocrat of Drawing-rooms”—A Grand Domino Ball—Cruel Trick of a fair Mask—An English Lady’s Maid takes a Bath—The first Cotillion Dinners given at Newport—Out-of-Door Feasting—Dancing in the Barn. But to return to our Cotillion Dinners. A friend thought they were impracticable on account of the expense, but I had remembered talking to the pr

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AN ERA OF GREAT EXTRAVAGANCE.

The first private Balls at Delmonico’s—A Nightingale who drove Four-in-hand—Private Theatricals in a Stable—A Yachting Excursion without wind and a Clam-bake under difficulties—A Poet describes the Fiasco—Plates for foot-stools and parboiled Champagne for the thirsty—The Silver, Gold, and Diamond Dinners—Giving presents to guests. Let us now return to New York and its gaieties. The Assemblies were always given at Delmonico’s in Fourteenth Street, the best people in the city chosen as a commi

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ON THE BOX SEAT AT NEWPORT.

The Four-in-Hand Craze—Postilions and Outriders Follow—A Trotting-Horse Courtship—Cost of Newport Picnics Then and Now—Driving off a Bridge—An Accident that might have been Serious—A Dance at a Tea-house—The Coachmen make a Raid on the Champagne—They are all Intoxicated and Confusion Reigns—A Dangerous Drive Home. It seemed at this time, that the ingenuity of man was put to the test to invent some new species of entertainment. The winter in New York being so gay, people were in the vein for

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SOCIAL UNITY.

Grand Banquet to a Bride-elect—She sat in a bank of Roses with Fountains playing around her—An Anecdote of Almack’s—The way the Duke of Wellington introduced my Father and Dominick Lynch to the Swells—I determine to have an American Almacks’—The way the “Patriarchs’ ” was founded—The One-man Power Abolished—Success of the Organization. The two young women of the most distinguished bearing in my day in this country were, in my opinion, the one the daughter of our ex-Secretary of State and ex-

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A GOLDEN AGE OF FEASTING.

A Lady who has led Society for many Years—A Grand Dame indeed—The Patriarchs a great social Feature—Organizing the F. C. D. C.—Their Rise and Fall—The Mother Goose Ball—My Encounters with socially ambitious Workers—I try to Please all—The Famous “Swan Dinner”—It cost $10,000—A Lake on the Dinner-table—The Swans have a mortal Combat. As a rule, in this city, heads of families came to the front, and took an active part in society when they wished to introduce their daughters into it. The first

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ENTERING SOCIETY.

How to introduce a young Girl into Society—I make the Daughter of a Relative a reigning Belle—First Offers of Marriage generally the Best—Wives should flirt with their Husbands—How to be fashionable—“Nobs” and “Swells”—The Prince of Wales’s Aphorism—The value of a pleasant Manner—How a Gentleman should dress—I might have made a Fortune—Commodore Vanderbilt gives me a straight “Tip.” I would now make some suggestions as to the proper way of introducing a young girl into New York society, part

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ENTERTAINING.

Success in Entertaining—The Art of Dinner-giving—Selection of Guests—A happy Mixture of Young Women and Dowagers—The latter more Appreciative of the Good Things—Interviewing the Chef—“Uncle Sam” Ward’s Plan—Mock Turtle Soup a Delusion and a Snare—The Two Styles of cooking Terrapin—Grasshopper-fed Turkeys—Sourbet should not be flavored with Rum—Nesselrode the best of all the Ices. The first object to be aimed at is to make your dinners so charming and agreeable that invitations to them are ea

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MADEIRAS.

Madeira the King of Wines—It took its Name from the Ship it came in—Daniel Webster and “Butler 16”—How Philadelphians “fine” their Wines—A Southern Wine Party—An Expert’s shrewd Guess—The Newton Gordons—Prejudice against Malmsey—Madeira should be kept in the Garret—Some famous Brands. Having had your champagne from the fish to the roast, your vin ordinaire through the dinner, your Burgundy or Johannisberg, or fine old Tokay (quite equal to any Johannisberg), with the cheese, your best claret

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CHAMPAGNES AND OTHER WINES.

Brût Champagne—Another Revolution in treatment of this Wine—It must be Old to be good—’74 Champagne worth $8 a bottle in Paris—How to frappé Champagne—The best Clarets—Even your Vin Ordinaire should be Decanted—Sherries—Spaniards drink them from the Wood—I prefer this way—The “famous Forsyth Sherry”—A Wine-cellar not a Necessity. The fashionable world here have accepted the Brût champagne, and avoid all other kinds; ladies even more than men. But another revolution is to occur in this countr

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DINNERS.

Assigning Guests at Dinner—The Boston fashion dying out—The approved Manner—Going in to Dinner—Time to be spent at table—Table Decoration—Too many flowers in bad taste—Simplicity the best style—Queen Victoria’s table—Her Dinner served at 8:15, but she eats her best meal at 2 P.M. — Being late at Dinner a breach of good Manners—A Dinner acceptance a sacred Obligation—A Visite de digestion. The Boston fashion adopted here for years, of one’s finding, on entering the house in which he was to di

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COOKS AND CATERING.

Some practical Questions answered—Difference between Men and Women Cooks—Swedish Women the cleanest and most economical—My bills with a Chef—My bills with a Woman Cook—Hints on Marketing—I have done my own Buying for forty years—Mme. Rothschild personally supervises her famous Dinners—Menu of an old-fashioned Southern Dinner—Success of an Impromptu Banquet. Twenty years ago there were not over three chefs in private families in this city. It is now the exception not to find a man of fashion

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BALLS.

The “Banner Ball”—How to prepare a Ball-room Floor—A curious Costume and a sharp Answer—The Turkish Ball—Indisposition of ladies to dance at a Public Ball—The Yorktown Centennial Ball—Committees are Ungrateful—My Experience in this Matter—I discover Mr. Blaine and introduce Myself. In 1876, asked by a committee of eighty-two ladies to act as Manager of a ball they were getting up at Chickering Hall, in aid of the “Centennial Union,” to be called the “Banner Ball,” I accepted their flattering

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FAMOUS NEWPORT BALLS.

A Famous Newport Ball—Exquisite effect produced by blocks of Ice and Electric Lights—The Japanese room—Corners for “Flirtation couples”—A superb Supper—Secretary Frelinghuysen in the Barber-shop—I meet Attorney-General Brewster—A Remarkable Man—I entertain him at Newport—A young Admirer gives him a Banquet in New York—Transformation of the Banquet-hall into a Ball-room. The next great event in the fashionable world was a Newport ball. A lady who had married a man of cultivation and taste, a

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AN ERA OF EXTRAVAGANCE.

New Era in New York Society—Extravagance of Living—Grand Fancy Dress Ball in Fifth Avenue—I go as the Lover of Margaret de Valois—A Great Journalist at Newport—A British Officer rides into a Club House—The great Journalist’s masked Ball—A mysterious Blue Domino—Breakfast at Southwick’s Grove to the Duke of Beaufort—Picnic given President Arthur—His hearty Enjoyment of it—Governor Morgan misjudges my “Open Air Lunches.”—The Pleasure of Country Frolics. We here reach a period when New York soc

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WASHINGTON DINNERS AND NEW YORK BALLS.

I visit Washington as the guest of Attorney-General Brewster—A Dinner at the White House—Amusing arrangement of Guests—The Winthrop Statue—The memorable Winters of 1884-85—A Millionaire’s House-warming—A London Ball in New York—A Modern Amy Robsart—Transforming Delmonico’s entire place into a Ball-room—The New Year’s Ball at the Metropolitan Opera House—Last Words. The following winter my friend Attorney-General Brewster invited me to Washington to pass a fortnight with him, and I then got a

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THE PRESENT FASHION IN STATIONERY.

THE PRESENT FASHION IN VISITING CARDS. [Image unavailable.] In America the residence is always in the right corner. In England, if any residence is engraved on a card, it is in the left corner. In France, no lady’s residence is now put on a card. [Image unavailable.] [Image unavailable.] [Image unavailable.] [Image unavailable.] [Image unavailable.] P. P. C.: Pour prendre congé. Translated into English: To take leave. [Image unavailable.] [Image unavailable.] [Image unavailable.] [Image unavaila

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FORMS OF INVITATIONS USED BY MR. McALLISTER

[Image unavailable.] INFORMAL ACCEPTANCE OF INVITATION TO DINE. [Image unavailable.] INFORMAL REGRET OF INVITATION TO DINE. [Image unavailable.] ANOTHER FORM OF AN INFORMAL ACCEPTANCE OF INVITATION TO DINNER. [Image unavailable.] FORMAL REGRET OF INVITATION TO THEATRE PARTY AND SUPPER. [Image unavailable.] FORMAL ACCEPTANCE OF INVITATION TO OPERA AND OPERA BOX. [Image unavailable.] FORMAL INVITATION TO DINNER. [Image unavailable.] INFORMAL INVITATION TO THEATRE AND SUPPER. [Image unavailable.] F

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